As part of my Writer’s Residency at The John Rylands Library, I’m writing a series of blogs… here’s the first – The Power of Asking.
“I’ve just been appointed the first writer-in-residence at The John Rylands Library. How did I manage this wonderful achievement? I asked.
Sounds easy.
It wasn’t. If you’re anything like me (and the longer I live, the more I realise I’m not alone), asking is far more difficult than it sounds.
Let’s start at the very beginning, a very good place to start. Unless you were born with a set of silver spoons in your mouth (which is everyone reading this, right?), then you’ve worked out that opportunities don’t fall magically into your lap. You’ve had to work hard to get where you are.
I like what Julia Cameron (author of the inspirational ‘The Artists Way’) says: “Pray to catch the bus, then run as fast as you can.” It’s a reminder to put myself into the path of opportunities. The bus does not come to the front door. I have to leave the house, and darn well run for it.
I have to take a deep breath, and ask. So, why is it so difficult?
Here’s my take. I grew up with a spectacularly unhelpful dictum: Ask, don’t get. Don’t ask, don’t want. I shared this with friends recently, and was shocked to discover it’s very common. I end up stuck in a bizarre Catch 22 situation, thinking that if I have to ask for something, then I don’t deserve it. Or, that I must to wait for someone else to ask me. The most I’m allowed to do is stand around looking hopeful.
This lose-lose mentality is combined with a vicious internal critic. I call her Mavis (I’ve blogged about her here and run Anti-Mavis workshops). She never, ever says anything nice. If someone says they like my writing, Mavis jumps in and whispers ‘they’re only being nice.’ In fact, she can be neatly summed up by this great Savage Chickens cartoon (Doug Savage):
Naturally, my internal critic undermined any notion that somewhere as amazing as The John Rylands Library would want the likes of me.
So – standing up and asking for what I want can be pretty damn hard. I’m swamped with fears of rejection, coming over as needy, an underachiever, someone who’s failed because they need to ask.
Luckily, this isn’t a poor-me blog.
Years ago I decided that I was not going to let fear of rejection stop me living a life that is too darn short as it is. I take inspiration from Jia Jiang, whose TED talk about dealing with rejection is well worth 15 minutes of anyone’s time.
So, however hard it is to ask, to put myself forward, to send that manuscript to a competition or agent – I take several deep breaths and do it. In the words of Susan Jeffers: ‘feel the fear and do it anyway’.
And here’s the good news. The John Rylands Library is delighted to have a writer-in-residence. Correction: The John Rylands Library is delighted to have me as a writer-in-residence.
I have told Mavis to put that in her pipe and smoke it.
Coming next – what I asked for, and how to ask for a residency.”
https://rylandscollections.wordpress.com/2018/12/10/the-power-of-asking/
I’m honoured – my essay ‘Don’t Fence Me In’ is included in this wonderful collection! (Nine Arches Press, ed Ian Humphreys)
‘What motivates poets in the 21st century? How do they find their voice? What themes and subject matters inspire them? How do they cope with set-backs and deal with success? What keeps them writing?
In Why I Write Poetry twenty-five contemporary poets reflect with insight, wit and wisdom on the writing life, each offering their distinctive take on what inspires and spurs them on to write poetry. Also - individual writing prompts to help you create your own new poetry.’
https://ninearchespress.com/publications/poetry-collections/why-i-write-poetry.html
A wonderful way to end a difficult year – ‘What Girls Do in the Dark’ selected by Pippa Hennessy as a Poetry Society Best Book of the Year!
https://poetrysociety.org.uk/poetry-news-best-books-of-the-year/
“Finally, Rosie Garland’s What Girls Do in the Dark (Nine Arches) – Garland is a true gothic polymath. This is reflected in her poetry, which roams through astrophysics, war zones, quantum theory, human biology, history, relationships and non-relationships, and more. The poems in What Girls Do in the Dark take this variety to extremes, yet somehow manage to bring concrete details and abstract ideas from all these areas together into a coherent, explosive, dazzling, gorgeous whole.”
– Pippa Hennessy is a bookseller at Five Leaves Bookshop, Nottingham.
Thank you Henry Normal for selecting What Girls Do in the Dark for Northern Soul’s Best Reads of 2021!
Books: Northern Soul’s Best Reads of 2021
Henry Normal, poet and writer
What Girls do in the Dark (Nine Arches Press) by Rosie Garland is my favourite poetry book of the year. Garland was a singer in the 1980s post-punk/goth band The March Violets. More recently, she’s established herself as a poet and novelist with several titles. I had the honour to read with her in Birmingham a while back, so when her new collection was released I was already interested. From the first poem I was captivated. She has a way of keeping one foot tentatively in the world we know with the other searching for a foothold in an unseen or imaginary world. I was inspired and transported by these poems in a way I’ve not experienced since first getting excited by the possibilities of poetry in my teens. I suspect it would not be good form to choose one of my poetry books for this feature but even if it was, I would choose Garland’s What Girls do in the Dark.
https://www.northernsoul.me.uk/books-northern-souls-best-reads-of-2021/
Thank you Vive le Rock magazine, for the great feature on The March Violets!
https://vivelerock.net/product/vive-le-rock-84-motorhead-girlschool-preorder/
Well, look at what happened on Record Store Day UK on July 17th 2021!
The March Violets ‘Big Soul Kiss’ - all the 1980s BBC Sessions in one place.
And PURPLE vinyl too #RSD21 #rsddrops
UPDATE – the entire pressing sold out in 24 hours. Jungle Records are releasing a CD version in 2022… plus more releases planned. Watch this space!
https://www.facebook.com/JungleRecords/